Have you ever got the feeling that someone believes they are indispensable? Have you ever heard people say things like:
- I am the only one who can do this job
- Without me, this project/team/organization would fail
- So and so cannot live without me
- Everything depends on my being there
- “It” (event, project, job) can’t start without me
Worse, have YOU ever said these things?
Human beings like to think that we are indispensable. Indispensability is wrapped up with our sense of importance and the deep need to be significant. After all, if we are not needed, then how can we be important and significant? Who are we in this world? What is our value?
Yet, we are NOT indispensable, and we should not aim to be. We are all going to check out of the organization/job/family/planet at some point in time. That’s a sure inevitability. So why in the world do we act as if the world will, and should stop when we are not around?
Suppose we lived our lives – family, work, play – as if we were dispensable? As if things would continue when we are not there? Suppose we brought up our children to be independent of us. Suppose we organized our work so that it continued flawlessly in our absence?
Years ago, when I was running my family business, I decided to take a 2-week vacation. My mother was horrified, as I don’t remember her ever taking any such time off. “But what if something goes wrong” she asked. I replied: “Well Mummy, if things are going to fall apart, it’s better I know it sooner rather than later”. She sighed. I proceeded on my vacation, which by definition was unplugged since those were days before the internet, social media, email and mobile phones were in popular use. I returned to find that things were just fine during my absence.
Making ourselves dispensable is immensely liberating. It frees us to do what we want to do – not what others expect us to. It frees others too, although they may not realize nor warm to it initially. By making ourselves dispensable we are allowing others to take responsibility, to learn and to grow. What a gift to others! And isn’t that fundamentally what great leadership is about? Why would we want to keep that gift to ourselves by acting as if we are indispensable?
It’s good to remember that we are not indispensable and that the world will keep on spinning without us. It is even better to live our life, do our work and be free to play as if we are dispensable.
I agree we re not indispensable but when we aren’t around our business or we loose an employee, things become different. Sometimes business and the environment are better and sometimes not ( at least for awhile)
One thing is for certain life and business moves on.
Thank you Wallace – so wonderful to hear from you! That’s the risk leaders take – sometimes things are better when we are away and sometimes not. But at least in the latter, we can see where the problems are!
Gratefully and joyfully
Marguerite
This is so timely Marguerite. Thank you! Certainly, we must work hard but we must also ensure that we train and mentor others. It is also important to take time out and just let go. Advice we all need to follow.
Thank you Shakira. And sometimes the training and mentoring involves us stepping out of the way, and allowing team members to do their job. They can, and we must trust them
Gratefully and joyfully
Marguerite
Once again sage advise.
To me the sign of a very good leader is things run very well when they are not there.
Thanks Michael. That’s one of the reasons I am adamant that leaders take unplugged vacations – the only way they can know how well their team works is when they are not there.
Gratefully and joyfully
Marguerite
Unfortunately, especially with a small business, the owner may think they are indispensable. I would be scared if I had that mentality because that would mean my business has no chance of survival without me. I strongly believe in mentoring and cross training. One person cannot know everything. We are each unique individuals and so we bring our uniqueness to the table. Imagine how amazing the business would be with the diversity and collaboration of all those unique perspective? How invested the people would feel and be knowing their input mattered?
Thanks Eve. It’s difficult for CEOs of small businesses to take time off. But if they develop the belief that they are not indispensable, they will structure their business accordingly. It may take time, but it can be done, and your approach of mentoring and cross training would be critical. Funny though, it’s my corporate clients that have the biggest challenge with this – the ones with lots of support and backup. They have a tough time of getting into the “I’m dispensable” mindset. But once they do, they are smiling!
Gratefully and joyfully
Marguerite